My Favorite Pieces of Advice
#1: Life isn’t fair. As Aaron Burr says in Hamilton, “Life doesn’t discriminate / Between the sinners and the saints / It takes and it takes and it takes.” Even though the phrase is a common cliche, it’s true. Sometimes things happen to us for no good reason, and we will never understand why. Chalking these instances of bad luck up to random fate can help us move on and keep fighting the good fight.
#2: Step out of your comfort zone. No one ever accomplished anything great while staying in their comfort zone. If you want to grow and find success, you have to be ok hearing the word “no” and stepping outside what’s comfortable. It’s terrifying but so rewarding in the long run.
#3: Take every opportunity you are given. Another helpful piece of advice if you’re looking to find success. To obtain the job or life you want, you have to gain experience, and that starts by taking every opportunity. Even if it seems small at the time- take it!
#4: Aim for the stars. If you miss, you’ll land on the moon. Even if you are faced with rejection, at least you tried, and now you are still further than you were before. If you aim too big, you will still have moved forward.
#5: Trust your intuition. Your body knows what is good for you. If you meet someone and you get that feeling at the bottom of your stomach, they probably aren’t good for you. While we often think the feeling of butterflies means we are falling in love with someone, it can often indicate that our body is nervous around someone.
#6: Not everyone who enters your life will teach you something. We often hear that every person we meet will teach us something, and on some level that is true, but it also rationalizes instances of abuse. Not everyone who comes into your life is there to teach you something, sometimes they are just there to show us how terrible they are. Don’t hold onto someone because they are “meant to be”. Sometimes it's best to live and let go.
#7: We don’t know what will happen in the future, focus on what you’re doing right now to create the future you want. I live in the future. I’m always thinking about what will happen in five, ten, fifteen years. It really helped me when I was given this advice. It reminded me that I can’t control my future by thinking about it. Living in the present will influence your future the most.
#8: No one is focused on you. We often worry about what someone will think about our outfit or our hair. But have you ever gotten your hair chopped and no one noticed? It’s because no one is focused on you- they are focused on themselves. It’s human nature. We think there’s a giant spotlight on us at all times, but there really isn’t. Everyone else is just trying to survive too. And if someone is super focused on your every move, that’s a sign they might be a bit jealous.
#9: Do what you want, not what you “think” you should do. Too often we live our life doing what we think other people want us to do. Start doing what you want. You’ll be a whole lot happier.
#10: Blood doesn’t mean anything. Family can be anyone. Friends might treat you better than your family. Don’t let a toxic family member stick around just because they say they’re blood.
#11: Don’t burn bridges. You never know when you will need someone, it’s true. Even if you feel it’s best to separate someone from your life, don’t burn the friendship completely.
#12: Not all criticism is constructive. You will receive lots of criticism throughout your life. Some of it is necessary to help you improve your work. However, some people will criticize you just because they can. Some people take their personal criticisms out on other people. So if you receive a criticism that doesn’t quite fit, disregard it, and keep doing what you’re doing.
#13: Never stop learning.. There is always something new to learn about the world. From learning life hacks on Tik Tok to watching a documentary. It’s so important to keep feeding your mind new information.
#14: If you don’t know what to say, say nothing. Sometimes saying nothing is the most powerful response. If you find yourself in an argument with someone, it’s ok to say nothing. It’s ok to take your time with your response. It’s better to think carefully about your words than to blurt something out you may later regret. The same goes for making a big decision. If you’re unsure what decision to make, take some time to think about it.
#15: Think about how you speak to yourself. If you wouldn’t say it to your best friend, don’t say it to yourself. Don’t speak to yourself any differently than you would a friend or family member. You deserve the same kind of compassion and love.